Ryann Reflections

A glimpse into the life of one anti-social stripper nerd.

Friday, March 24, 2006

Prove me wrong

I intend on educating myself out of reach. I know my independence is intimidating. I know I’m more than tits and ass. You don’t want to know what books I read. You don’t want to hear my thoughts. You don’t want to appreciate me.

What respect?

I don’t fit your expectation. I don’t conform to your ideal. I don’t want to. I’m a feminist who loves men. I’m an academic that wants a family. I’m angry at the disrespect and objectification, but I believe in sex. I’m NOT unique in my desires. I’m not alone in my quest. I’m not isolated in my ambitions.

I am a daughter, a sister, a friend.
I am not a lover, a partner, or girlfriend.

I miss it. I miss it so much. I want the respect and romantic love. I want someone to hold me when I cry and kiss me when I sleep. I want someone to look into my eyes and see more than sex, more than a prize. I want someone to see the weakness, the bitch, the humanity, and the love.

I am a woman. I am proud to be a woman, proud to know the strength and adaptability of my sex. I want to believe! I want to have faith, but I don’t. Why does Women’s Studies repulse so many men? Does the word “feminist” intimidate and disgust?

How can you claim to love women, but dismiss the pain, struggle, desires, ambitions, and choices? How can you claim to love women but ignore the complexities of the individual?

Damn straight I’m angry and frustrated. I want someone to prove me wrong.


  • At 11:01 AM, Blogger limpy99 said…

    Good luck with that. You sound like a challenge worth taking.

  • At 1:21 PM, Blogger empme said…

    I so relate to what you have written. I also believe that people are complicated, and those complexities must be celebrated and fully embraced.

    As for the feminist piece, I have found that it is accepted by other feminists - in my experience thus far, academia is good for that, at least.

    With a sigh, I wish you good luck and tell you that you are most certainly not alone.

  • At 2:52 PM, Anonymous Dirty Sanchez said…

    When I was around 12(1979) I saw something on the news about Gloria Steinem and asked my mother what a feminist was. She said that it was someone, anyone (not just women) that believed that men and women are equal.

    Unfortunately, that definition has been forgotten by too many people.

    The real truth is that men and women are NOT equal. We have equal rights, or should have, we have equal responsiblities, or should have, but we are not the same. We don't think the same, we don't reason the same, hell - we don't even inhabit the same dimension on some days.

    I think that is what makes the whole male female relationship interesting. How can you relate to someone who you love and respect, but are not capable of fully understanding? Therein lies the challenge and most of the fun ... cause I would really rather not date men, too hairy. yuck.


  • At 3:05 PM, Blogger Cairde said…

    Hey Ryann, I am back from my trip. I wish my week in the sun enjoying the sounds of the ocean provided me with some answer that would prove us both wrong....I am still looking. We will find some reasoning, some explanation for the world today....that I have to believe!

  • At 3:12 PM, Anonymous tnt_rori said…

    Hi RR
    Here's some thoughts to ponder for you in response to your questions.
    As someone that is attracted to independant women I strongly feel that I'm doomed to be alone. There is the percieved strong need for women to feel superior to men which goes beyond the equality factor. Feminism has been overshadowed by feminazis. I think that is also the reason that Women's Studies repulses men, likely by design. Men and women are not equal and will never be equal, they are however, equivelent and complimentry.
    The words girlfriend and boyfriend have fallen out of popularity to the more common partner, I believe that is because people have taken that as possesive as opposed to associative.
    Boyfriend and girlfriend are no more possesive as mother, daughter, father, son. I'm surprised that parrent & offspring aren't used more often considering that far too PC mindset.

    As for the claim to love women but not the individual, that is an unfortunate writing off based of stereotype. To quote the movie _The Breakfast Club_ "Dear Mr. Vernon: We accept the fact that we had to sacrifice a whole Saturday in detention for whatever it is we did wrong, but we think you're crazy for making us write an essay telling you who we think we are. You see us as you want to see us: in the simplest terms, in the most convenient definitions. But what we found out is that each one of us is a brain, and an athlete, and a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. Does that answer your question? Sincerely yours, The Breakfast Club. "

    Human beings are complex, far more than just male / female. The differences shouldn't be pushed aside, but instead celebrated.

  • At 7:31 PM, Anonymous Gölök Zoltán Leenderdt Franco Buday said…

    We are a species of dual polarities.
    Therefore we long for a deed, in-love
    as we do being-in and I don't mean
    an in crowd that are not being-in but
    a deeper existential thing. It's a call
    to mate, but in some cases a mistaken
    sentimentality; so a feeling must be
    Desperation is the danger. Males oddly
    enough are as fragile emotionallt as a
    female is physically, and I don't mean
    strong and week in a extremist feme way.


Post a Comment

<< Home