Ryann Reflections

A glimpse into the life of one anti-social stripper nerd.

Sunday, July 30, 2006

Regulations and lighters

At 3am I grabbed a shower and started packing. I don’t travel light, and the days of conforming to baggage regulations are officially gone. I have too many hats, among other things. My head aches from the lack of sleep and I’m thankful that I at least look better than I feel. My attitude on the other hand is erratic.

Canadian regulations apparently state that lighters are a dangerous good and cannot be in checked luggage. I have lighters, over a hundred in fact. I have lighters that have flown through Edmonton, Yellowknife, Vancouver, Winnipeg and Thunder Bay… but this morning that ended. Apparently it’s not allowed.

“This is fucking bullshit!” the words certainly came out of my mouth as I glared in frustration and disbelief at the pretty little blonde’s suggestion that I pay a cab to take my promo to the Greyhound. Perhaps not the most eloquent retort becoming of a lady, but none the less I did feel it was an appropriate response to an absurd dilemma.

Thankfully the blonde did work around the regulations in such a way that I’m not fuming. I’m actually amused- though inconvenienced.

I’m not allowed to check lighters. BUT every passenger is permitted to carry one lighter on the flight. At this moment a handful of people are carrying lighters decorated with topless stickers of Ryann Rain. I can outfit an entire plane with stripper promotional lighters, but it’s illegal to leave them in my actual suitcase.

The remaining 50 lighters are now sitting in the airport in Thunder Bay, awaiting my return in 3 months. West Jet is happy to baby-sit them for me. Weird.

And the day has just begun…

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  • At 4:25 PM, Blogger Gadzilla said…

    Ok, you have me stumped. Not only are you on a tour of duty, but you also have to keep your own promo stuff with you as you travel? Ya know, maybe you should become a promotions manager for other dancers as your going along. Then eventually you can concentrate on the business side of things and not so much of the dancing. Just a thought.

  • At 4:31 PM, Blogger Ryann said…

    I like dancing.

    baby-sitting strippers is NOT appealing. I am self-employed!!

    Everything from travel to promo to costumes, bookings, marketing.. etc... is personal, out of pocket, and individual.

  • At 10:16 PM, Anonymous rori said…

    Transport Canada regulations are silly which is why I'm glad I've never flown commercially. Usually I don't step onto an aircraft without at least 2 knives a lighter and maybe one of those little mini-torches.

    It kinda amazes me that they let you get away with that for as long as they have.

    Maybe another thought would be to have a cache of lighters stashed in various cities and just take the stickers with you so you can put the appropriate promo on them.
    Maybe even Westjet will look after them for you in each city :)

    Here's the appropriate website for future reference and/or the benefit of the other readers.

  • At 12:02 PM, Blogger Ginger said…

    well thats just messed up...but I love the creative "thinking outside the box" solution that your pretty blond came up with!

  • At 4:25 PM, Blogger Gadzilla said…

    Sorry, I have quite a bit to learn about the industry you work in. I didn't realize that the agency didn't help promote the dancers.
    I guess I'll just sit back and listen more.

  • At 2:31 AM, Anonymous Gölök Z. L. F. Buday said…

    In this day of massive 911 massive stupidity is the law, I do think those Ryan Rain dynomite promotions were a bit far. None-the-less, yeah, "fucking bullshit," is putting it lady like in this case, low life big Government wants to globalize bring in Über Nazi (Ü.N.) taxation and free trade (for their contributors) and then treat individuals flying within the country (or colonial land in the case of things like Canada) like they are travelling internationally, maybe a passport from BC to Alberta. All this oppression on everybody to find one Arab who isn't likely to blow up or highjack plains with lighters in the cargo hold? Hah! Talk about self justification. I myself, 1st Generation, automatically an Enemy of State at birth according to the CSIS Act.

    As for "Promotions Manager," I figured they tended to do that themselves. Since most don't always do it.
    Usually when you get one of those they want to turn you out into "the game" porn vid. or street.


    Gölök Zoltán Buday
    "The first destroyer of the liberties of a people is he who first gave them bounties and largess." -- Plutarch (c.45-125 A.D.) Priest of the Delphic Oracle


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