Ryann Reflections

A glimpse into the life of one anti-social stripper nerd.

Wednesday, June 27, 2007

Top 10 dumb-ass questions guys ask strippers.

I know I’m supposed to be a fantasy but even when I’m flirting around a strip joint in a slutty lil’ skirt I’m still a woman. I know strippers are mystical magical creatures that just appear. I know customers often want to “know more” and create some picture in their head of who we really are. Often men want to “rescue us” from our tragic fate.

For some reason when males walk into peeler bars all manners are lost and the most offensive and rude questions are asked. Things everyone knows never to ask a woman, we hear multiple times a day. Lucky us!

Top 10 dumb-ass questions guys ask strippers.

10. Where do you live?

9. What does your boyfriend think of you dancing?

8. How much for the night?

7. What else do you do?

6. How old are you?

5. How much money do you make?

4. What’s your REAL name?

3. I don’t feel right giving you money. Can I take you out for dinner instead?

2. You’re too pretty to be here. Why don’t you do something better with your life?

and the #1 dumb-ass question...
1. It’s my birthday can I get a free dance?

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  • At 10:29 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hmmmm.... Is asking "where you are you from?" the same as "where do you live?"

    The reason I ask - I ask the question to find out if they are from B.C. Ontario or Quebec.. etc... I don't need to know the street or even the city.

    If it is the same, I'll stop asking :D

  • At 2:15 AM, Blogger Ryann said…

    No it's close, but not quite the same. It's when guys want to know the street and the neighbourhood, or what high school I went to that I get defensive and annoyed.

    I hear "where are you from?" probably 20-50 times every day. It's repetitive but it's not offensive.

    It's a valid question during a conversation considering how much dancers travel. I also ask customers the same question because many are in town on business.

    Just ask yourself WHY you're asking the questions you are. If it's to "know" the "real" girl... then it's in the same category as what's your "real" name? Accept and enjoy the fantasy.

    That's what we're there for ;)

  • At 2:29 AM, Blogger Mr. Fabulous said…

    Damn, I thought these were sure fire lines. Well, back to the drawing board! LOL

  • At 3:14 AM, Anonymous Dr. Zaire said…

    The similarities are uncanny

    Top Ten dumb questions that strippers ask guys

    10-Where are you from?

    9-Are you married?

    8-What do you mean you are broke? (after a lap dance:)

    7-What kinda car do you drive?

    7-Do you come here often? (while pointing to some dirty spot on the couch)

    6 -How old are you?

    5-How much money do you make?

    4-Are you a cop?

    3-What do you do?

    2-Are you a lawyer/plastic surgeon/accountant/producer/drug dealer?

    1-Do you have your credit card with you?

  • At 10:21 AM, Blogger Ryann said…

    hahahahahahahahahaha awesome!!! Thanks for that. I love it. guess I'm doing pretty okay on not asking the dumb-ass questions ;)

    of course I already admitted to "where are you from?" especially when the conversation goes...

    how much for a dance?
    RR: $40
    Wow! That's WAY more than at home.
    RR: Oh where are you from?

    If the answer is Toronto or Montreal... I know I might as well keep walking

  • At 10:36 AM, Blogger KellyNerd said…

    well, really we already knew they were dumb... why, oh why do men feel the need to keep PROVING it??

  • At 1:09 PM, Blogger Annie Temple said…

    Hahahaha! I want that for the lit section of tnt! Hilarious, Ryann! You rock. :)

  • At 8:10 PM, Blogger Trée said…

    Ryann, I say the same thing (Just enjoy the fantasy) to all my readers who try to psychoanalyze my story and think that they have some rare insight to my trials and tribulations. Why the fuck can't people understand the difference between fact and fiction, between the chocolate and the meal? LMAO

    Show me the fantasy and I'll keep my frailing mouth shut. :-D

  • At 9:42 PM, Blogger Angry Orange said…

    Actually I ask where are you from because that will give me insight into the person. i.e. you say BC and Alberta, I am going to be able to have fun. You say Quebec or Ontario and I'm a friggin 'Mark' and you are going to most likely be bored dancing for me.

    Now I know I'm a 'Mark' overall, but I guess the BC/AB dancers are much better at portraying the fantasy better.

  • At 1:59 AM, Blogger Ryann said…

    "where are you from?" is NOT the same as "where do you live?"

    bob: so do you live around here?RR: nope. I live in Van.
    bob: oh whereabouts?
    RR: downtown.
    bob: what part of downtown? what street are you on?
    RR: hahaha like I'm going to tell you (dumbass)

    VERY different from...

    jon: I've never been here before. How come people aren't tipping? At home everyone tips.
    RR: Oh where are you from?
    jon: Portland.
    RR: Oh cool. I've never been.
    jon: No? you should. where are you from?
    RR: I'm a BC girl. Vancouver.
    jon: I like Vancouver. beautiful city and beautiful girls.


  • At 3:43 PM, Anonymous Dr. Zaire said…

    “Where do you live?” sometimes can be a crucial question to ask…

    RR: Hello sexy. Where do you live?
    Jon: I live in my van.

    Other equally unappealing answers are:
    Mental hospital
    Detox center
    Halfway house
    Another planet
    Homeless shelter

  • At 11:10 AM, Anonymous rori said…

    I've asked a few of those questions over the years. I'm finding that I'm being told without even asking these days.

    I used to ask what their real name was. Now that I've stopped asking I have found that I'm being told not only real names, but ages and high schools.

    As for locations if they're out of town they mention which city and if they're from town they'll mention which district like Killarney, Mount Pleasant or Oakridge.

    As for the "What else do you do?" It can lead to some good conversation. If they do some volunteer work for organization X maybe It's related to other stuff I've done. I've even been invited out to visit them at their "day job" or to a social event that's not at work.

    The bottom line for me is I try to be polite and act as if their husband is going to show up soon.
    Which has happened to me, twice.

  • At 7:36 PM, Blogger Kate said…

    Ryann, makes me wonder why these guys think they would get a straight answer when they are such dumbasses.

    I think I'd like to see you on stage in person -it'd be entertaining and fun when you're giving it all you have.

    I've only been to a peeler place once with some friends last year - it was kinda hot,even tho the girls just werent that interested in what they were doing. (Not the way you write about it anyway), care.. Kate

  • At 6:24 AM, Anonymous Gölök said…

    Some are legit sociological questions, jouranilistic or philosophical curiosity. All of which is rare in this day and age. Yeah, many are stupid like the getting laid question.

    Well pathetic more than stupid.


    Gölök Zoltán Leenderdt Franco Buday
    "Freedom includes the right to say what others may object to and resent... The essence of citizenship is to be tolerant of strong and provocative words." - Prime Minister Diefenbaker, April 9, 1970, House of Commons.

  • At 11:04 PM, Blogger bigdan1173 said…

    So, why do you girls ask if we are cops? I mean is there something illegal going on during a lap-dance?

  • At 6:05 PM, Blogger David said…

    So what can I expect if I ask a stripper or two out for dinner? Just curious because I set one for next week. Would they secretly consider me a dumb-ass? What would you expect the reaction to be?

  • At 12:37 AM, Blogger Purple Cow said…

    10. Where do you live? - Right next to the police station.

    9. What does your boyfriend think of you dancing? - One of them resents it, the other two think it's just fine. - Oh, he thinks it's great, he teaches boxing while I'm doing this, so the schedule works out just right.

    8. How much for the night? - It's a six hour shift, twelve songs an hour, 40 bucks for a lap dance, uh, I dunno, I'm not too good at math. - Marry me first, and it's free. Sort of.

    7. What else do you do? - Eat, sleep, go shopping, take care of my kids, vote, whip my slaves, visit Grandma, you know, the usual. -

    6. How old are you? - Don't worry, I'm over 18, you're covered.

    5. How much money do you make? - 40bucks for a lap dance, and whatever you want to tip for a pole dance.

    4. What’s your REAL name? - My parents forgot to give me one, they were drunk all the time.

    3. I don’t feel right giving you money. Can I take you out for dinner instead? - I think you got me mixed up with the other girl, the one standing outside holding the sign WILL WORK FOR FOOD. - I don't feel right eating dinner, it's against my religion.

    2. You’re too pretty to be here. Why don’t you do something better with your life? - Oh don't worry about that, I'll be uglier in a few years, and then I'll fit right in. - Oh actually I am planning to put my good looks to better use, you see during the day I'm studying to be an accountant.

    and the #1 dumb-ass question...
    1. It’s my birthday can I get a free dance? - Oh what a coincidence! It's my birthday too, will you give me a present?

  • At 12:36 PM, Blogger bball_alex08 said…

    One question. What i were to ask "how long have you been in the business?" and "do you enjoy what you do?" Would those be considered dumbass questions?

  • At 12:37 PM, Blogger bball_alex08 said…

    This comment has been removed by the author.

  • At 8:00 PM, Blogger Sparky said…

    Reminds me of all the idiots who get into web chat with the lady's knowing there only teasing until you pay them cash.. yet they still try there heart out by saying "Show me your ^*%, Pull off your panties, Etc" Its hilarious.

  • At 8:33 AM, Blogger MrJoe1987 said…

    I laughed at this nonsense. Not sorry, either.

    Let me get this straight...

    You have resorted to selling visuals of your naked body to people. You have given away little pieces of your dignity to everyone who gives you money to see you bare yourself to them. You have shamed yourself and your family's name in the interest of being paid... But you believe yourself to still be worthy of being called a woman? Laughable. You're a member of the female gender, at best.

    Manners? Laughable, again. Did it ever occur to you that the vast majority of male stripclub patronage (just like with hookers) consists of "men" who have absolutely no grasp of reality on how to talk to REAL women? That's why they come to see you! They know that you're an object that they can treat virtually however they want, because you're taking their money. They come to you because they know a REAL woman would never stand for their "manners".

    I don't go to strip clubs. I, personally, find that simply having sex is far easier and more cost effective than giving money to females with daddy problems. Real women tend to enjoy my company, and I like it that way. They're cleaner, for a start, and far more intelligent.

    Manners, my ass. You want manners? Get a real job.


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