Miss Nude Ontario 3rd Runner Up

Miss Nude Ontario 2006/2007.
(I'm the little one in the middle)

“Is this your stuff? Your things! I hate them.” She shakes her head as my paper lanterns are thrust into my hands before she turns and hobbles away. The Ultimate Feature is running the show this week. I quietly laugh at her intensity and expressions, but really I don’t know what we’d do without her. I’ve already learned so much. I know she wants to be on stage, and I know after a lifetime of dancing, and working through the pain, her body is finally betraying her. Like anyone who loves to dance, who lives to dance, who can’t imagine a life without the stage, the music, and the passion, I don’t know how you leave that. I love watching her. She’s so beautiful. She is The Ultimate Feature, and it shows. But this week, she’s in trenches, mopping up spilt milk and helping build a new generation of dancers. It may not be the same industry as it once was, but there is still a love of performance, entertainment, and dance in this handful of dancers. The girls are awesome, and it’s been a great group to work with. From being able to watch an incredible level of professionalism and performance in one moment, to watching the determination, and pure drive to improve in another moment, I’m so honoured to be a part of this group.

I watch in awe as snow and bubbles flood the stage. The strobes transform the room into a slow-motion mirage. The bar is packed, drunk and enthusiastic. On stage a naked girl is balanced upside down on a chair, soaking wet. Her back arched, and legs splayed she looks like a goddess.

Back to reality I finish assembling the lanterns and go over my props one more time. Everything is in order; the DJ’s know what to do. The rest is up to me. The nervousness from earlier in the week has faded into an excited confidence and acceptance. I’m not the best girl here, and that’s okay. I’m exactly where I should be. I’m here for the experience, to learn, improve, and build myself. I’ve done that. I’m happy with the show I know I can do. All I have to do is do it.

I watch the stage crew scoop up the disaster, quickly and efficiently. The stage is scrubbed and my props are hung. A quick thumbs up to the DJ’s and the booming voice starts again. “… and now contestant number 5…” My music slowly builds as I make my way to the stage, slowly, the costume demands it. The next 20 minutes are filled with passion. I fucking love my job. Layers of sequined materials are flung into the corner, piece by piece, as I move to the music and flirt with the crowd. I’m down to my g-string and accessories when the song ends and I exit down the stairs. Our Ultimate Feature rushes her crew past me with a tarp, and my pool. I overhear her give a few commands in French, but don’t understand them. I quietly pull off my shoes, choker, and gold g-string as the stage is set. I’m naked, and we’re ready. It’s time to make a mess. The music begins as I tip toe up the stairs and move across my stage. I feel the beat, and pour liquid colours over my body. Within minutes I’m covered in paint, sparkles, and I’m soaked from head to toe. With a final spin through the bubbles, and a seductive arch the music fades. I’m a mess, and I’m happy. It was a good show and I need a shower.

The night begins to blend into itself as we pack, and clean, and wait. I want to know how it all turned out, what all of our work culminated into. I want to know who won. It seems like days before the awards begin, hours, and hours of waiting. I’m starving. It was an intense week of performance, improvement, and a hell of a good time. But now, I’m exhausted and I want food, and sleep. After eons we’re finally gathered downstairs, showered, makeup repaired, and back in our gowns to finish the week, smile for photos, and satisfy our curiosity.

I came out with…

Miss Nude Ontario 3rd Runner Up 2006/2007

I also won,
Miss Nude Ontario’s Most Original Costume
Miss Nude Ontario’s Showgirl of the Year 2006/2007

Now I’m back in Winnipeg for a few weeks, exhausted and dazed, ready for the daily grind of the real stripper life… getting naked and getting paid. It’s a month away from the Miss Nude Canada Pageant, and I have a lot of prep to do.


(if I get the pictures, I'll post some when I can...)